Communication – For better holidays

Among the various situations a family could find itself into, the holyday planning is among the most stressful. Charlotte Olsen, an associate professor in family studies and human services at Kansas State University has some useful advices about this peculiar moment in a relationship in store. In any family holydays build up tensions, since the desire for a perfect leisure time makes people argue about preferences and gets all the preparing confusing.

Mrs. Olsen comments on the most difficult situation in holyday planning: that when the components of a family have different cultures. Various cultural origins result into various habits, and many persons regard these as part of their own identity, so they would never be set to avoid them. What’s more, a lot of the cultural identity is confined, in many cases, to religion and therefore the practices become driven by faith, for many a key factor in their mental well-being.

First, claims Mrs. Olsen, each member of a couple should be aware of the importance of cultural differences and regard the conciliation between his and the others cultural practices as vital for a harmonious existence in common. What each expects from a holyday, especially in what regards cultural habits should be a subject talked about long before this period arrives. In fact, discussions related to this matter are of the same importance as any others which make a couple’s life normal. Such as any activity that keeps life in a relationship going, like the earning of money, shopping or the after hours, so must talks about personal cultural habits make their way into the partner’s lives. As for any other type of conversation, the mental status of each partner should be in the condition to tackle this subject. Calm moments are required to prevent furious outbreaks during such conversations. Each partner should know when to open such a discussion, and this knowledge is obtained through the study of the other’s body language and psychology.

Another important act is, according to Olsen, to inform the family members in a time when the holydays are still in the distant future. The respect towards the other’s family members is crucial; each should give a helping hand to the others in solving family problems and those from other fields. Thus they would become more permissive towards your personal desires and respectful towards your cultural habits. Olsen stresses the fact that each should present his traditions and holyday expectations to others so no one would be unpleasantly surprised or unaware of the other’s intentions. Couples form new families and these evolve over time. The changes affect the extended family as well. Olsen believes these modifications should be dealt one at a time and the adaptation should be gradual. Time from time friendly discussions and a lot of patience are the keys towards an adequate development of family life.

After all, the main purpose of a holiday is to get a family together in a friendly atmosphere. All the efforts for the family’s harmony!

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